Hi, and welcome to first episode of the Still Point Project Podcast. My name is Ben Young and as the creator of this project I have bequeathed myself the title OldBen or OB for short because I am, let’s just say, an old soul.
I have been around the block. I know people like credentials in order to determine whether or not someone is worth listening to and in many ways that’s fair – except for one. We don’t make friends by asking for credentials. We listen to them, and in my case here, you can read from me. And it is through the words themselves, you and I can come to conclusions about those who make sense and those who do not.
Too much these days I believe we are being conditioned to be fearful and skeptical of strangers, when in fact we actually need people in our lives who do not look like us, think like us, perhaps talk like us, but who share some deeper commonalities like life itself and also the desire to live in such a way that we aren’t a train wreck. We want to have good relationships and receive from those relationships some goodness and support. We want to be able to be people who have substance and endurance when it comes to loyalty, but we don’t want to go so far in the direction of loyalty where we lose our own souls.
How do we do this? Unfortunately, I suppose, the process of change is a slow one, but on the other hand it enables us to continue living the lives we are living and make little changes as we see the need to do so. Yes, once in a while it is time for a new look, a new hair color perhaps, something to shock ourselves and others – hopefully in happy delightful ways – but usually our lives are lived one day at a time and sometimes even one hour or one minute at a time. Life is not always happy and the process of going through tough times actually is an important element of our maturity and character development. But when someone is in the middle of a lot of pain, it isn’t the time for others to try and help. It is the time to be quiet and listen. It is the time to wait for internal disturbances to settle and for voices and reminders that have encouraged us in the past to rise once again.
As part of creating this podcast within Substack I had to select some categories under which I believed this podcast should reach others. I selected Society and Culture – with the emphasis on relationships and I selected Health and Fitness with the emphasis on mental health. The truth of the matter is this podcast is between many categories, so if I did not have to select from a list, this is where I think my writings and podcast fit.
The Still Point Project is about finding recovery. It is about coming to a point that you see life is messed up and everyone’s answers don’t seem to fit anymore. It is about what to do when you don’t know what to do. It is about taking the oxygen mask first before giving one to others around you. It is about understanding at a deeper level recovery principles that have been around for decades and have resulted in the saving of countless alcoholics, drug addicts, other addiction addicts, as well as those who were codependently tied to these other suffering souls.
It is relearning one of the basic principles of water rescue that it is best to throw others a life line while still standing on solid ground. Avoid, if possible, jumping into the water with them and allowing them to wrap you up in their desperation panic and taking you to the bottom with them.
So, what is my vision for this project?
First I see little daily posts to be the best way of reminding people to continue to seek moments of solitude for the purpose of reflecting on important topics that in themselves may not be urgent. Life can be high stressed with many urgent action items on our to do lists. I see the purpose of my posts to disrupt the treadmill just a little. Overtime, the changes may become noticeable.
I do not see my posts to be all anyone needs in terms of sanity reminders. Rather I see my posts as reminders to wake up and spend some quiet time reflecting in any way you are drawn to do this. I did not put my podcast in a religious category, not become I am not personally religious, because I am, but I understand you are on a journey starting from wherever you are, not where I am. True spiritual growth begins with the inward journey to the still point of your life, but it is not a journey alone. True, if you read and listen to me, I’m sort of along for the ride with you, but that is of extremely small significance compared with those you see and talk with face to face, day to day. You need to find and maintain good friends. Right now you may have these, or those who might be calling themselves your friends are really not on your side and will not encourage you to be your best especially when it becomes difficult. Rather, fly-by-night so-called friends will want you to conform to their lives in order to help prop them up. No, you need solid friends who will encourage you through thick and thin.
You also need growth in your understanding about life itself, which I hope a little comes through me, but you need much more than I can provide. I encourage everyone struggling with relationships to go to a twelve-step program. You will, over time learn more about these here, but you need to go yourself and keep going back at least six times or more before you allow your mind to talk you out of the help they can provide. I am also in favor of church attendance. If this seems difficult to figure out, then look for common sense people who go to church. You might find them in the twelve-step program.
Finally, and I will wrap up this podcast with this. If the Still Point Project is impacting your life, please do a few things as thanks in return. First, whenever you read something or hear something you enjoyed, or made you think, please hit the heart button. What this does is it encourages others to read or listen to what you found helpful. Remember, you can do this anytime. Go back and reread things and hit the heart button whenever you choose to do so. I believe the internal program running Substack will limit your liking something to once, so when you see numbers of likes or hearts, you can know these are individuals, not someone pressing the button over and over.
The next easiest thing you can do is to share the posts with others. And although it is ok to share on social media, I think it is even better to share directly with people you know and who you believe would benefit from what you are sending them. If you encourage them to read and they find benefit then perhaps they will join the community –
Which brings me to the toughest thing for you to do, and that is to make comments. Brief comments are fine, but if something really causes you to think, then post what you are thinking so others can benefit and post what they too are thinking. In this way, perhaps a community will form and perhaps you will discover friends you haven’t yet met.
Finally, if you know me personally, then I make this offer. Send me your email and tell me how you and I know each other. I will then enroll you in a lifetime paid subscription to this Substack because, although I hope the population grows and supports me financially, I am not interested in this coming from old friends past or present. In addition, because you and I are friends, if you have a friend, you believe would be helped by my daily posts, then first send them a post or two and get their permission – then send me their email and I will do for them what I have done for you.
And the pay back? That you will become my ambassadors to others about this project so that subscriptions will grow. Keep in mind, one of the benefits of the subscription is it keeps control of the comments. People who are not invested in their own development often enjoy disrupting the serious work of others. This is why free subscribers are blocked from commenting.
That’s it. I will post another podcast whenever I can and it might be helpful. Take care of yourself. Bye for now.
OB Explains the Project