Pain, God, and Others
Pain separates and isolates us. It’s very personal in universal ways.
Others can’t really understand when we hurt. They have to take our word for it. (Of course the broken bone is a hint). There is no universal arbitrary measure of pain. This is because we are uniquely individual. Our nervous systems have certain variabilities as do our past experiences with life and pain management. Of course we believe others should understand completely and it’s easy for us to not understand why they can’t.
Here’s another thing about pain. Physical pain not only hurts, it can irritate emotionally at the same time. The longer pain lasts the more frustratingly difficult life is to manage. This affects relationships and can require us to work on being calm and patient when our bodies are screaming at us — and yet, no other human will completely understand at the time.
There are levels of pain. We all know this. Delivering a baby (not as the doctor, but as the mother) is universally agreed to being one of the worst. So is the kidney stone. Teeth can be culprits as well. But there are other forms as disruptive to life and many invisible to another’s eyes. For example, the loss of someone dear can result in a crushing pain that is able to collapse a large adult to the floor and mold them into fetal position instantly. They may wind up rocking and moaning for hours.
But as odd as it sounds, pain has a good side. It slows the overly busy and distracted forcing them to stop and talk to God and others. This can teach us the difference between the two - God and people. God is able to comfort in quiet internal ways, assuming of course we have a connection. People, on the other hand and as already been stated, can be wonderfully supportive in many ways, but still not completely understanding in others. This, I believe is not only normal, but as it should be. Pain isolates to get our attention and then when it achieves this it begins the process of softening and strengthening us in ways only pain seems able to do.
To Review
When it comes to pain, no one except God can completely understand anyone else’s.
Even though we cannot share pain directly, we can support others by being quiet, gentle, and prayerful. Let me put this another way. Talking does not help very much but being present does.
The greater the pain, the longer the recovery and the more components usually necessary to reach a healthy outcome.
The deepest recovery comes from within our spiritual centers where God can touch us and we can touch him.
Hear my cry, O God, listen to my prayer; from the end of the earth I call to you when my heart is faint.
Lead me to the rock that is higher than I,
