Love Defined

Hear me out.

Photo by Ben White on Unsplash

As we have already seen in the previous post entitled Pop Love, there is a lot made about love by those in our world. It saturates our music and our politics. Every religion addresses it, and most, I suspect, are in favor of it. The problem, at least as I see it, is there is not much agreement on what love actually is - which at least provides me with the excuse to share my opinion with you.

And as with everything I write, expect me to work against the grain, because I don’t think what the world thinks is usually very compelling. For this reason, at first just read to understand. After you understand what I am saying, then feel free to think whatever you like.   

To begin with, love is not a feeling or emotion we create. Rather, it is a power that acts, something that exists first outside the human heart. We didn’t make it. It is older than the universe. No, it isn’t a quark or black matter, but just as binding, original, and unique as these other life and matter building blocks.

So, what is it?

Love is a link between you and your world. It draws you toward whatever it is you decide to love.

Two words come to mind as the opposites of love: hate and indifference.

As love draws you toward, hate repels you away. And as love cares, indifference couldn’t care less.

Here is how Robert Frost’s poem Fire and Ice puts it.

Some say the world will end in fire,
Some say in ice.
From what I’ve tasted of desire
I hold with those who favor fire.
But if it had to perish twice,
I think I know enough of hate
To say that for destruction ice
Is also great
And would suffice.

Hate is fire and indifference ice, which is itself just a form of cloaked hate.

Love always begins with a decision to move toward an object (whatever it is), which is another way of pointing out that love can never be forced.

At the same time, love is never just a decision. It encompasses all the actions that follow as a result of the decision to love. If you are tracking what I am saying, there is a huge implication with this. It means that what follows a decision in the present moment to love, may result in a long journey into the unknown that the lover (the one who made the decision) no longer controls.  

Tomorrow, I’ll tell you about Love’s Twin.