How Many Friends Do We Need?
Let’s tackle a proverb today
Question:
Is it good to have a lot of friends?
Most of us would say, “Sure,” but the following proverb adds a caution.
A man of many companions may come to ruin,
But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.
Proverbs 18:24 (ESV)
When we are young, we just want to be liked, and the more people who like us, the more significant we think we are.
With age comes experience that will, at times, hopefully force us to reconsider whether or not popularity is all it’s cracked up to be.
Now I am not the first to observe that social media is a two-edged sword. It enables us to find people with common interests around the globe, but it also sucks us into an ironic illusion. While we are spending more and more time in front of a glowing screen of some internet-linked device believing we are “connecting” with “friends,” we are losing connections with real people. We think, as a society, we are making friends when we are actually becoming more and more isolated. This might explain why Generation Z, those between the ages of around 12-28 — all born after the Internet came of age, and who also experienced COVID while in school — are experiencing the highest levels of anxiety and depression of any age group today.
Now, more than ever, it is important to be grounded in reality and the importance of having strong friendships where we live. These are human beings living life around us, people we can go, see, and touch today if we need to. And trust me, we all need to.
When thinking economics, many financial advisors recommend an emergency fund. This is money set aside to be used only at times of real emergency. We should think in similar ways about relationships. Who are those in our lives we could call at any time day or night and they would respond in positive ways? And the reverse must also be true. Who are those around us who we will drop whatever we are doing to help should they need it?
We all need sticky friends, those who stick to us closer than a brother. Now, having said this, I don’t know how we find these people. Rather, I believe we are set near them by God and it is our responsibility to figure out who they are. And, FYI, they may not be who we think they should be. Certainly, they may not be anything like us, but there is something that will reveal to both parties that they are safe souls who can be trusted.