Conflict as it Relates to Marriage

Three thoughts on the subject.

Photo by Richard Lee on Unsplash

1

There is a worldwide conflict over whether or not the nuclear family (father, mother, and children under one roof) is of any value or significance.

One side believes that mankind was designed to operate within a marriage and family structure. This belief is not the product of a particular religion, ethnicity, or culture. But this sanctity of marriage and family is opposed by many who, for the most part are single themselves, predominantly young, and affluent (at least their parents are). Poorer people trying to survive and keep their children alive don’t generally have time for such cultural crusades. Also understand that their opposition to the nuclear family is linked to their view about the value of human life which is linked to their belief about the existence of God.

2

The vast majority of divorces are the result of conflict done poorly.

3

All lasting good marriages are the result of conflict done well.

Men and women are different and the same. They have much in common and they are completely mysterious to the other. They were designed to fit together in a particular way for a profound purpose that has nothing to do with their individual happiness.

The creation of man was not finished until the woman came into being. This makes sense biologically for our species. We do not self-divide and multiply. The male alone could not have procreated and in addition, being a guy, he would not have been particularly nurturing.

So mankind is made to bring out the attributes of the two different creations who are also one together. Without man and woman there are no families and you and I would never have existed.

By understanding these seemingly confusing truths about men, women, marriage, and children that sadly should be universally self-evident, we can significantly reduce family conflict and protect it as an institution.

Suggestions

1. Learn from those you admire how to disagree with respect and love.

2. Learn in marriage how to make mutual decisions rather than fight to win arguments.

3. Learn that changes throughout life affect marriage and therefore the fact the problem presented today by one of you was never a problem before is irrelevant.

4. It is silly to fight to get our way. We should fight for what is best for the marriage and the family.

5. Most conflict involves stating our conclusions about matters rather than explaining clearly how we came to those conclusions.

6. God created marriage and families, so all attacks on these institutions are really attacks on the sovereignty of God.

   

   Photo by Adele De Bruyn on Unsplash